The Igbo Woman And Her Plight

Story by AMARA
news
Last Updated:Friday, August 12, 2011

We all go about saying and believing we live in the 21st century, the era of civilization in Nigeria and Africa in general. We believe we now have so many educated people in our society. The truth is that we have people who went through school, acquired degrees, without allowing school to pass through them.

I was reading an article sometime back on the issue of the Osu caste system in Igbo land. I read something about many great brains coming from the east; I agree with this. But it is very painful when you have those great and educated minds getting involved in some barbaric practices and even standing to encourage them.

I remember a man who is in the middle of his Phd work sending me some terrible messages because I spoke out against the practice of Osu caste system in Igbo land. He first asked to know if I am Osu and when he confirmed I am not one, he went ahead talking in ignorance. I was so pissed off that I unconsciously told him that he is a disgrace to education and to God, the maker of mankind.

I am not here today to talk about the Osu caste system and its madness, but about the plight of the girl child in Igbo land. I have noticed one thing among the Igbos; education plays a very minor role in our lives and mindset. In fact, our behaviours as easterners to a greater extent are determined by upbringing and not education.

After my last Friday’s article on the way we treat people before and after death and the things widows go through in the hands of in-laws, a man from the South-south called me amidst pain and tears. This man lamented the ordeal of his late wife in the hands of her relations who are from the east. I am yet to fix a meeting with this man who is in so much pain because of some obsolete and barbaric traditions. I shall, by the grace of God handle these devilish traditions one after the other.

Having looked into the other Nigerian tribes, it appears to me that we, the Igbos, have the worst tradition when it comes to the issue of the girl child.

Let us start from the moment a woman gets married. Have you listened to our fathers pray during traditional marriages? All you hear is, “you shall have Okereke and Okarafor…Iseeee”. This is the number one proof that the girl child is seen as nothing in the Igbo culture. The woman gets into her husband’s house only to start praying for a male child due to the pressure she gets, even from her own mother. Your in-laws agree that you are well settled in your husband’s house only when you have a male child.

As the children are growing up, the girl child is taught that her place in life is in a man’s kitchen and so she must put the kitchen before the school. I agree that every woman needs some good housekeeping and cooking skills. But where we have the girl child drop out of school because she must get married and help train her siblings in school; I don’t know what to say.

Many Igbo men today misbehave because they believe they are childless as the woman keeps giving birth to female children. Many marriages packed up simply because the woman was unable to have a male child. In those days, our fathers freely took second wives, but the case is different for some men who are now religious leaders and as such cannot take second wives. A friend recently told me about a very rich Igbo man who lives here in Lagos, but does not travel to his hometown because he is made to feel he is not a full-fledged man without a son. This is one of the numerous miserable conditions our tradition has kept people in.

I remember a woman, a relation to the man I was married to, actually making a foolish comment to the hearing of my mother when I had my first child; a female. She laughed and said, “Why is Amara giving birth to a female child when she is expected to have a male child first?” Today, I have two girls and two boys, but the woman’s daughter who got married about six years ago has none today. Most times we forget we are still humans and talk like God.

A reader called me just last week to narrate his story to me. This man has four girls who are all doing wonderfully well today. He told me how other women were coming to his wife to remind her she was not safe without a male child. Thank God for this wonderful man who continued assuring her of his love and support for her. Today, they are all married and are lawyers, biochemist, and chartered accountant.

A good number of Igbo men still believe life is not complete without a male child. This has led them to torture their wives as if they are the ones responsible for their so-called ordeal. Sir, you are the one who decides the sex of your child. It is what you put into the woman she gives out. The woman has XX chromosomes while you have XY chromosomes. If you give out your X, it goes to meet any of her own chromosomes and the result is a female child. But if you give out your Y chromosome, it meets with any of her X and that is when you have a baby boy. Now you agree with me that your wife does not deserve that ill-treatment she is getting from you.

If you are not proud of your girl child, why stretch your legs and clear your throat when it’s time for her bride price to be paid? Some men see their female daughters as another good in the warehouse. In fact, I have heard some Igbo men call their daughters by that name; it is a shameful thing.

You don’t want to appreciate the fact that your wife gave birth to girls, but you have the audacity to sit and collect millions as bride price. Some men see their daughters’ marriage as an occasion to make money. This is why you have a lot of mature Igbo ladies still very single as the men are now scared of all the expenses to be incurred during engagement. Some even add their own on top only for them to sell them after the marriage.

How do you think your daughter will feel by the time she realises that her father left nothing for her? The Igbo culture believes a woman is just an extra to humanity. They believe she has no portion in her father’s house and the same thing happens when she gets to her husband’s house. A girl child is made to believe she lives just to get married and raise children.

You can make yourself different by having your daughter inherit some things from you. It is not enough giving her the best car on her wedding day; she should have something to hold on to in her father’s house. Let us stop this ill-treatment being meted out on the girl child. I feel terribly bad about this issue and I think it’s time we made the change. Our educated men should begin to act educated and treat women the way they should be treated; as human beings.

Do you have a story/gist for publication? Please email it to story@nigeriafilms.com
Igbos
Nogzi
8/12/2011 7:28:20 PM
Wow Igbos have to do something about this barbaric traditions. I thought the wind of christianity blew in that area years ago?
Reply
eziokwu
oluwasnoop
8/12/2011 7:30:30 PM
gbam!!
Reply
@Topic
somebody
8/12/2011 7:37:16 PM
May God bless u amara, this is the problem not only in lbo tribe also in some part of nigeria too i pray God almighty deliver the tribes that practice this evil act in Jesus name, firstly there is nothing like osu everybody are equal in the sight of God, secondly male or female child are gift from God they should be treated the same,
Reply
U sound so bitter
Inno
8/12/2011 7:49:50 PM
I can sense a big complex from ur article...I don't actually know who you are directing ur grudges to...Igbo Women, Igbo Men or the general Igbo ethnic group. I suggest you learn how to put your points across without presenting a nagging and "am good and all of you are nothing" attitude. A man was trying to make his point on an issue and you are here disrespecting his contribution by ur insults...why not make him understanding ur views without resorting to brandishing him an educated but not civilized f**l...learn how to respect others opinion for urs to be taken.
Reply
@inno
Etisalat
8/12/2011 8:09:17 PM
U are completely correct,am not surprised at all,at her s****d,childish,biased and insultive behavious while narative,the unfocused writer,thought she can change ppl views and mindsets,with insultive and attacking words.
Reply
@inno
Etisalat
8/12/2011 8:17:02 PM
U are completely correct,am not surprised at all,at her s****d,childish,biased and insultive behavious while narative,the unfocused writer,thought she can change ppl views and mindsets,with insultive and attacking words.
Reply
@inno
Etisalat
8/12/2011 8:17:12 PM
U are completely correct,am not surprised at all,at her s****d,childish,biased and insultive behavious while narative,the unfocused writer,thought she can change ppl views and mindsets,with insultive and attacking words.
Reply
@etisalat and inno
James
8/12/2011 8:28:58 PM
I completely agree with both of you,it is an established fact,that this pimp of a writer is very disrespectful in driving home her point,imaging this scallywag calling an elder with ph.d a 'disgrace' just bcos he is trying too make his point,am not surprised at all most igbo women are known too have total disrespect and disregard towards their elders.
Reply
Most igbo women are what???
Nigerianandloving it
9/6/2011 11:59:29 PM
I agree with you on her disrespect towards an elder with a Ph.D. This man is an educated man stating his honest opinion , but your completely wrong when you say that "most igbo women are known too have total disrespect and disregard towards their elders".How would you know? Do have the statists on this subject? I am an igbo girl and I understand that this is your opinion but, I know for a fact that if I ever said anything disrespectful to any elder I would be given a "dirty slap". I don't know which igbo women your talking about they must be somewhere far off because igbo people don't joke with respect.
Reply
@etisalat and inno
James
8/12/2011 8:29:25 PM
I completely agree with both of you,it is an established fact,that this pimp of a writer is very disrespectful in driving home her point,imaging this scallywag calling an elder with ph.d a 'disgrace' just bcos he is trying too make his point,am not surprised at all most igbo women are known too have total disrespect and disregard towards their elders.
Reply
At james
Kel
8/12/2011 8:40:27 PM
Though u quite right,but i disagree with u dat most igbo women are disrespectful 2 their elders,igbo women are knwn 2b industrious,respectful nd determing,4get dis bias writer,in every twelve there must b a judas,the home she comes from determines they way she writes with anger nd frustration,4geting dat it not d way 2 change people's mindset,bye 4now.
Reply
@INNO U SOUND SO BITTER
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
8/13/2011 1:27:22 PM
Inno, pls get below to GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE. I MAKE A VERY SIMILAR POINT, AND MUCH MUCH MORE...FROM A WOMAN'S PERSPECTIVE.
Reply
@Amara
chioma - NY
8/12/2011 8:42:40 PM
Amara you are right at some point but do not say that; people pay millions as bride price, common how many people have millions in Igbo land to pay as bride price. In my home town; it is 1,500 naira and which many parents do not take more than 40 naira this days, and some even don't take at all.
Reply
@ Chioma
Zizi
9/12/2011 2:39:04 PM
Yes.

Chioma; in some places parents don't even collect any amount. In my place, the official amount is N24. From Ebonyi; Afikpo; they collect so much even hitting millions excluding the material gifts given to the girl's family - father, mother, grand parents (if alive), cousins, aunties, uncles, clansmen etc. I know this for sure because my uncle married from there. After spending so much on his traditional marriage, he had to wait for 2 years before the "white wedding" because the poor man was financially broken when he was done!
Reply
chioma
keee
8/12/2011 11:20:59 PM
chioma pls whiich vilage is that so i will go try my luck there..........while the writer may be partially right, i think she should not generalize.

irespective of whatever.......the igbo women and men are still very special people.........i wonder what life would have been without being igbo
Reply
chioma
keee
8/12/2011 11:30:39 PM
chioma pls whiich vilage is that so i will go try my luck there..........while the writer may be partially right, i think she should not generalize.

irespective of whatever.......the igbo women and men are still very special people.........i wonder what life would have been without being igbo
Reply
@Amara
Amebo
8/12/2011 11:57:43 PM
I don't know why Amara choose to diss igbos nowadays comon we have biting issues facing the country, ranging from the suffering of the masses to all the political matters.all these are things of the past now we have current issue,
Reply
@Amara
Nnamdi
8/13/2011 12:10:43 AM
Amara.just thanking u for your teachings.u don Make me understand many things.Am born abroad and have Never been to naija.CAN't even understand The languages or even The culture.i have my roots In Anambra but have Never been there,don't even know about naija.my email is ngoyan@hotmail.fr.i Wish i have a woman like u by my side.
Reply
Oh puuleasee!!!!
Hmm
8/14/2011 4:05:32 PM
Nobody cares..
Reply
Oh puuleasee!!!!
Hmm
8/14/2011 4:06:04 PM
Nobody cares..
Reply
You really sound unintelligent
Ime
8/13/2011 5:52:52 AM
Reading this article makes me believe that you are just proud but clueless, you think you know more than anybody else, wonder if you know the meaning of tradition? am not in anyway a supporter of the "osu" system, but being educated does not translate into loss of ones identity, people have a right of openion just as you have yours, and have stated so in this article, do not call people s****d just because your openion differs from theirs!
Reply
Amara
ime
8/13/2011 5:55:35 AM
but you look pretty shar Lol
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
chinonye
8/13/2011 10:16:14 AM
there are also other cultures where a male child settles the woman ... king henry VIII of england married 6 wives in search of the golden fleece; and more recently, lady diana had to have two male sons before they left her alone!...

furthermore, a lot of upper class families in europe {who have huge estates to pass on} are also quite keen to have a male child born into the family.

AGAIN I AM IGBO, AND MY MUM HAD 4 OF US [ALL GIRLS] AND WHEN SHE DIED IN 1980, MY FATHER NEVER REMARRIED IN SEARCH OF A SON!!.

so author, please do not speak in ignorance.
WHEN YOU POINT A FINGER AT YOUR OWN PEOPLE, ALL YOUR FINGERS POINT BACK AT YOU!
ka fa na eli, fa ana eli onwe fa? mba nu!!!

that is the problem with ignorance...it does not allow for one to test one's topic with proper research. a wide comparative study of an area is often necessary for the testing of one's hypothesis.

again generalisation is a disease - there is no absolutism in life. please keep the essay professional next time, so that some of the points you make will be given more consideration. it defeats the purpose to use abusive words when trying to reach the quiet consciousness of people.

besides, if you are igbo, you ought to know that the picture you painted, as your painted it not a true presentation of the situation... unless of course your own experiences have clouded your psyche.
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
chinonye
8/13/2011 10:50:24 AM
RE: But where we have the girl child drop out of school because she must get married and help train her siblings in school; I don't know what to say

THIS IS AN INTERESTING COMMENT. I SUBMIT THAT THE AUTHOR'S VIEW IN THIS REGARD IS VERY SHALLOW.
SHE SOUNDS LIKE AN ONLY CHILD: I MEAN WHAT IS SHE SAYING? THAT IF HER PARENTS WERE NOT WITH HER ANYMORE[GOD FORBID] SHE WOULD NOT QUICKLY MARRY A MAN WHO IS IN WEALTH SO AS TO SECURE THE LEGACY OF HER FAMILY, WHICH HER FATHER WOULD HAVE DONE IF HE WAS AROUND?

VERY SELFISH...AND I HAVE TO SAY VERY UN-IGBOLIKE MENTALITY. I HOPE SHE IS NOT ONE OF THOSE WHO WERE NOT WELL GROUNDED IN AFRICAN CULTURE BEFORE BEING CARTED AWAY ABROAD [OUTSIDE AFRICA].

If she employs her brain, she will see that if the first daughter of a family drops out of school so that she can marry a man that will train her 5 younger brothers and sisters, then 5 people in her family would have be educated as opposed to 1 person...that's how a real igbo person thinks.

A lot of people from certain states in igboland who did not follow this thinking are in those states in igboland called the backward states. [ndi na afuro uzo -meaning those without foresight or vision] the igbos know what im talking about.

however, go to a state like anambra state...there are so many wealthy and successful people from that state - do you know why? because ever since the biafran war, the people from that state have always made sure that where a family is poor and cannot afford to train their kids, the first daughter, without even being told will know that the ticket out of ignorance and poverty [and into education or trade] for her family is for her to get married and take along her younger ones. there is no resentment in this, because most of our daughters want to see their younger ones do well.

they want to see their family progress.

it is rare in an average anambra person's household not to see ones extended family unit living there, with the breadwinner catering for ALL OF THEM...and when i say catering, i dont mean feeding them for a while; no, i'm talking about training them in school, or a trade until they graduate and become independent. that was how quite a vast part of igboland was able to rebuild after the BIAFRAN WAR.

IT WAS ALL SACRIFICE SACRIFICE SACRIFICE!!!

IT IS ALL SACRIFICE SACRIFICE SACRIFICE!!!

Obviously if something bad happened in the authors family, she would carry her grammer, and selfishly head off : that is unafrican in my opinion.

I dont know if it is true, but i heard that in ekiti, where there are somany academics, those professors do not train their relatives as much as they should, if they do at all...so that when people attend the burial of a professor in that area, they are often surprised at how many wretched [close] relatives he has. i dont know if it is true, but if it is true, then it would be no doubt, the kind of mentality of the author that would be responsible.


Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
chinonye
8/13/2011 10:56:52 AM
RE: As the children are growing up, the girl child is taught that her place in life is in a man's kitchen and so she must put the kitchen before the school.

well, you should speak for yourself on this. growing up i hardly went into the kithen, and i regret it to some degree.

besides, who do you want to cook for your husband? the bible said in proverbs that a good wife / woman keeps her home.

if you do not agree with this, maybe you should invite mercy johnson, in the alternative, a very good calabar housegirl to take care of your husband for you!
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 11:00:25 AM
RE: In those days, our fathers freely took second wives...

NO, YOU SHOULD SAY YOUR FATHER... SPEAK FOR YOURSELF
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 11:20:51 AM
THIS IS BECOMING VERY INTERESTING.......

I HAVE BEEN READING THIS ESSAY, AND GETTING EXCITED, AND MAKING COMMENTS AS I GO ALONG...LINE BY LINE.....

YEA, YOURE RIGHT, IM BORED STIFF, WITH NOTHING ELSE TO DO THIS MORNING.....GUILTY!!!!

Anyway, i came along to the line where the author says, and i quote:

" a relation to the man I was married to"

and i said aha, so she is no longer married!!!!!!!!!! maybe i should not judge so harshly, but then she has open herself up for any criticism, since she herself has judged certain aspects of our culture through smuged lens....

hence, here it comes: no wonder she could not run and KEEP her home-

- SHE RESENTS HER KITCHEN...

-MAYBE SHE EXPECTS HER HUSBAND TO COOK FOR HER...no, i forgot - she was waiting on mercy johnson to come in....

-HER ONE TRACK CRITICISM OF THE IGBO CULTURE WITHOUT CLEARING UP THAT THIS VIEW THAT APPLIED IN EVERY IGBO HOUSEHOLD,

BUT ONE WHICH NO DOUBT 'APPLIED' IN ***HER *** HOUSEHOLD.

-WITH ALL HER BEAUTY, SHE COULD NOT KEEP A MAN - SO MAYBE WE SHOULD BE LOOKING AT THE CHARACTER... HOW BAD WAS IT THAT INSPITE OF HER LOOKS, AND GRAMMER SHE STILL FAILED?

[i know some flags have gone up bad bad... but please, dont give me that, any christian/ and wise well educated woman knows that the man is the head of the house - there can not be 2 masters in a house...2 captains cannot run a ship...there is a reason for this arrangement.
IT IS NOT BY ACCIDENT THAT THE WOMAN IS THE ONE TO CARRY A PREGNANCY FOR 9 MONTHS, AND NUTURE THE BABY WHEN IT IS BORN... IT IS A NATURAL SEQUENCE WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. IT IS THE ""ORDER"" OF NATURE. IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT... [take a cue from our friend]
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 11:35:42 AM
I am still going on....

you see, when she talked about the male child business, she was talking about her ex husband's family.

dear author, the fact that your in-laws may have their natural habitat under a stone in the cave, does not mean that every igbo man comes from under a cave.

i am quite happy to tell you that perhaps if you and your people were not so selfish, and trained your relatives [cause obviously if you came from that kind of family, perhaps you would not hold the views you have] ,
maybe...just maybe you would have been placed in a stronger position, and your inlaws would have been forced to respect you!

POSER: Can you imagine someone like DORA AKUNYILI'S DAUGHTER being pushed around by her in-laws?

Answer: No i can not!!! lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

why? because apart from her parents who are who they are, she is surrounded by her uncles and aunties who are also properly educated and independent....because sacrifices were made along the way by those who came before her.
THAT KIND OF FAMILY [where the object of interest is standing on the shoulders of gaints] IS QUITE DAUNTING FOR WOULD-BE IN-LAWS.
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 11:40:29 AM
RE: Today, I have two girls and two boys, but the woman's daughter who got married about six years ago has none today. Most times we forget we are still humans and talk like God.

THIS STATEMENT IS ALL ABOUT REVENGE...She talks og God, yet she is mocking a childless woman who did not say anything to her. the only crime she commited , to get mentioned in this essay, by way of this glorious truiibut the author had paid her in her situation is that she is the daughter of a woman who was unkind to her. I will say she is judging.
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 11:48:41 AM
RE: A good number of Igbo men still believe life is not complete without a male child. This has led them to torture their wives...

SPEAK FOR YOUSELF, IF YOUR HUSBAND TORTURED YOU, CONFESS YOUR HUSBAND TORTURED YOU....SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELF AND MOVE ON.

YOU SAID TODAY YOU'RE BLESSED WITH BOYS AND GIRLS, YET YOU ARE STILL GOING BACK TO THE CASE OF YOUR HUSBAND AND HIS PEOPLE. FIRST YOU TALKED ABOUT OSU SYSTEM...THEN YOUMADE A DECOY AND WENT IN ON YOUR IN-LAWS....

THIS ESSAY, I SUBMIT, IS NOT ABOUT OSU, OR THE IGBO TRADITION OR THE YORUBA OR BINI TRADITION FOR THAT MATTER...

THIS ESSAY IS ALL ABOUT YOU AND YOUR EX IN-LAWS, DARLING.
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 12:02:50 PM
RE: It is what you put into the woman she gives out. The woman has XX chromosomes while you have XY chromosomes. If you give out your X, it goes to meet any of her own chromosomes and the result is a female child. But if you give out your Y chromosome, it meets with any of her X and that is when you have a baby boy.

WELL THAT IS THE SCIENCE OF IT.
WHAT ABOUT THE MISTERY OF IT? HAVE YOU IMAGINED THE SCENARIO WHERE IT IS YOUR DESTINY TO HAVE TWO GIRLS IN YOUR HUSBANDS FAMILY, WITH THEIR FUTRURE ROLE PLANNED OUT BY GOD. IF YOU ARE NO LONGER WITH THAT HUSBAND, AND GO TO ANOTHER MAN WHOSE DESTINY IS TO HAVE 4 BOYS, MY DEAR ALL THE Y CHOMOSONES IN THE MANS SYTEM WILL GUN FOR YOUR EGGS.

IN OTHERWORDS, IT MAY BE ARGUED THAT THE SCIENCE THAT GOES ON WITH THE SPERM AND THE EGGS, IS WHAT BRINGS THE INDIVIDUALS ALREADY PLANNED DESTINIES IN THE SPIRITUAL REALM TO REALITY.

Ask yourself why those who see visions suceed with their prophesy, when they tell [some] barren women that they should not worry, that they would have so so number of children [eg you will have 2 daughters... and it comes to pass?

or where a woman is in a mans house and her pastor tells her to tell the husband to confess why she cannot take in.....and after he confesses and apologises to whoever, she takes in immediatel...

MY DEAR, THESE THINGS ARE SETTLED IN THE SPIRITUAL BEFORE YOU CAN COME TO THE PHYSICAL TO START YARNING XX YY XY etc
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 12:06:36 PM
RE:If you are not proud of your girl child, why stretch your legs and clear your throat when it's time for her bride price to be paid? Some men see their female daughters as another good in the warehouse. In fact, I have heard some Igbo men call their daughters by that name; it is a shameful thing.

ALL I CAN SAY TO THIS IS THAT I AM SURE THAT IF HER FAMILY DID NOT SELL HER 2 TIMES OVER [ {whisper} and counting], SHE WOULD NOT BE SO DISPOSED IN THE ABOVE STATEMENT
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 12:15:38 PM
RE: How do you think your daughter will feel by the time she realises that her father left nothing for her? The Igbo culture believes a woman is just an extra to humanity. They believe she has no portion in her father's house and the same thing happens when she gets to her husband's house. A girl child is made to believe she lives just to get married and raise children.

READERS, PLEASE I ADVISE THIS SECTION BE IGNORED.

WE DONT NEED A SOOTHSAYER TO TELL US WHO THIS SECTION IS DEDICATED TO. [it soulds like the i am talking to *************my people************** section, or better yet the 'daddy, this one's for you' section]

I CAN SAY ON GOOD AUTHORITY AS AN IGBO PERSON THAT MOST EDUCATED SELF SUFFICIENT PARENTS DO NOT EVEN WANT THE INLAW TO FEEL THAT THEY HAVE BOUGHT A COMMODITY, SO THAT IN FUTURE THEY WOULD NOT BE SUBJECTED TO THE KIND OF EXPERIENCE THE AUTHOR MAY HAVE GONE THROUGH DURING HER FIRST MISSIONARY JOURNEY
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 12:19:17 PM
A girl child is made to believe she lives just to get married and raise children.

YA, SHE'S IN THE HEAD OF 18 MILLION IGBO GIRLS IN BOTH HOME AND ABROAD.

YEA YEA YEA, YOU GUESSED RIGHT...SHES IN MY HEAD TOO! OKAY!!!
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 12:28:42 PM
RE:You can make yourself different by having your daughter inherit some things from you. It is not enough giving her the best car on her wedding day; she should have something to hold on to in her father's house.

I TOLD YOU SHE WAS TALKING TO HER DAD AND UMUNNA


AS FOR HER CONCLUSION TO THE END THAT: "Our educated men should begin to act educated and treat women the way they should be treated; as human beings" , THAT IS SQUARE AND I MEAN SQUARELY A GOLDEN, TEAR JERKING TRIBUTE TO HER EX HUSBAND.

FINALLY, I THINK THIS ESSAY SHOLD BE RETITLED:

"ME AND MY PLIGHT: A COMPARATIVE STUDY OF MY EXPERIENCE IN THE HANDS OF THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT MEN IN MY LIFE - DADDY&UMUNNA Vs MY HUSBAND {EX}"

bless you and peace out



Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/13/2011 12:44:29 PM
oh i forgot to add that without proper research on a topic she has chosen, it would be best in future to retire her thoughts, of the intellectual level we have seen, in her diary. this is diary worthy and not publication worthy.

NOTE:
I add that all the comments i have made, and all the opinions that i have held are made and held in good faith, and in the exercise of my fundamental right to impart ideas and opinions without interference, and according to the law as it applies under SECTION 37, 38, 39, and 40 of Chapter IV of the CONSTITUTION OF THE FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA 1999.
Reply
@chinonye
Chinyere
8/13/2011 5:35:45 PM
God bless you a millions,you are very spectacular,and greatly on point,it very unfortunate that dis writer cant present are writing properly,very biased,clueless and pathetically shallow minded.
Reply
GENERALISATION IS A DISEASE
Chinonye
8/14/2011 2:36:51 PM
thanks chi.
Reply
Chinonye
Dv Archi
8/22/2011 3:37:25 PM
@Chinonye, i'll caption this your article "Igbo Girls and their plight (Remix)". Sometimes in music there is how some "Remix" are even more pleasant than the original song...

In this case i'll say I enjoy your articles more than that of the original writer cos if it were to be food i'll say that it has all the 6 classes... so no further comment am filled alread...
Reply
I beg to differ
Wateva
8/14/2011 4:20:26 PM
Ibos do not represent Africa as a whole and what u v just said in your article is a problem facing Africa as a continent..infact ibos are very good at sending there girl children to skuul cos they are very proud people and see that as an investment..don't know where u get your facts from but u need to check out the number of ibo girls In all Nigerian universities and compare then to that of the boys...as for the male child thingy,it is universal..it is not particular to ibos ..have u read about the Indians,Chinese etc..please verify facts darl and don't diss on your own.
Reply
You got this wrong
kwupu okwu
8/15/2011 1:12:25 PM
My Yoruba girlfriend once told me that her mother once told her that Igbo traditions does not benefit the women folks and all sorts of other things.
You see, it's this kind of articles that confuse people and paint Igbo people bad. Back in my secondary school days in the 90's, I had a friend whose family was in serious financial distress that he had to quit school (with the approval of his parents) just for his sisters to get education with the little money they had. I think later, his other brothers, had to quit too and go into business so as to enable their sisters finish school. I have never heard of any Igbo family that denied their daughter(s) education. They encourage it! So please stop sending the wrong vibes and thereby confusing people. Stop writing nonconstructive article. And stop exposing your personal issues to the world.
Reply
is not true
ij
8/19/2011 4:00:40 PM
Any way i dont know the part of igboland you come from.most of the things you said is not true where i come from the only thing i know is the outcast isssue in some cases they still inter marry.these days no right thinking parents indulge in all the issues you raise here,learn how to talk to people in a respective manner.
Reply
chinonye
ingrid
8/21/2011 6:13:57 PM
iam not a nigerian and obviously not from your tribe.but, i lived in nigeria for close to two years while carrying out some medical research.from there i came in contact with most of the major tribes in your land.though i love native cultures in general,one stood out for me and that is------- the igbo tribe.they are very uniek p/p.i mean no disrespect to the other tribes,but there is something about them that really touches my heart which i cannot go into right now.in every culture ,there is the good the bad and the ugly.there are things to be fixed but i think that amara has to learn to discuss and write with respect about the issues she is trying to tackle.that is the only way one can bring a change, and not by sarcastic manner.
Reply
Who are your advicers Amara ?
Nnedimna
8/21/2011 7:08:18 PM
Infact, i do not know ,whom you are trying to impress in all your negative writings about Igbo Culture and Tradition Amara? . Is it your advicers, or those funding your writing? I have been following, some of your write ups on Igbo people, is always negative and false WHY? If you are an Igbo Lady as you claim to be, then your knowledge about Igbo Tradition and Culture is very minimium. You still need a lot of extra lessons. This character assassination of our Igbo Fathers, Brothers and Husbands by you, MUST STOP IMMEDIATELY Amara. If you do not have any educative contributions to write, then MOVE OFF . In Nigeria of Yesterday, Today and Tommorrow, an Igbo man is ready to forefit everything, to make sure that his family have the best in life be it in education or otherwise but you Amara, never mentioned such positive findings. Maybe, you had a very bad childhood experience, or your relationship is not going well as you would have wished ,then please, for God`s sake, do not use your own bad experience as a yardstick for others.

Before writing on Igbo Culture or Traditions, ask questions, do a lot of research and try to be very objective. Write also about the good aspects. If you have any suggestions, then table it ,and stop pushing your bad writings and wrong findings down our throat because a lot of people from other tribes, do read your writing. Secondly, stop insulting your readers. Stop giving people wrong impression about Igbo culture. I am happy , that a lot of people like Sister Chinonye and others, are now beginning to confront you about this trasch. We are watching. Publish the correct information about our Igbo Culture and Tradition. Osu is bad, but there are other good traditions, why don`t you mentioned them.? If you are not proud, about your Igbo Culture and Traditins, as you claim to be an Igbo Lady, then a lot of us are. Lastly, and most importantly, STOP THIS CHARACTER ASSASSINATION of our Igbo Fathers, Brothers and Husbands. I hope i made my self clear. Have a good day.
Reply
@nnedimna
Nneoma
8/26/2011 9:10:31 AM
May almighty God bless u beyond ur imagination,u nd chinonye,hav said it all!!!
Reply
FALSE INFORMATION
FRANK TALK
8/31/2011 2:03:54 PM
EVERYTHING THING THIS WOMAN SAID HERE IS ALL ABOUT HER LIFE HISTORY. NONE OF THEM HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH IGBO TRADITION. THE ONLY THING THAT EXIST IS THE 'OSU' CASTE SYSTEM WHICH ALMOST ALL THE TOWNS IN IGBO LAND HAVE ABOLISHED,SO WHY CONTINUE MAKING REFERENCE TO SOMETHING THAT EXISTED DURING OUR FORE FATHERS DAYS?
PLEASE GO AND LEARN ABOUT IGBO TRADITION AND CULTURES BEFORE YOU START WRITING ALL THESE YOUR 'TRASH'
Reply
FALSE INFORMATION
FRANK TALK
8/31/2011 2:09:30 PM
EVERYTHING THING THIS WOMAN SAID HERE IS ALL ABOUT HER LIFE HISTORY. NONE OF THEM HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH IGBO TRADITION. THE ONLY THING THAT EXIST IS THE 'OSU' CASTE SYSTEM WHICH ALMOST ALL THE TOWNS IN IGBO LAND HAVE ABOLISHED,SO WHY CONTINUE MAKING REFERENCE TO SOMETHING THAT EXISTED DURING OUR FORE FATHERS DAYS?
PLEASE GO AND LEARN ABOUT IGBO TRADITION AND CULTURES BEFORE YOU START WRITING ALL THESE YOUR 'TRASH'
Reply
piDiPYgeqvoHM
Zamorano
2/19/2012 5:48:28 AM
Goodness me! What a fshrndeiip. Loved reading through this one a definite favourite of what you've written so far!LP x(Who has made many typos and corrections in the writing of this comment that's how great it is!)
Reply
lBCJLjskPTe
Bristol Airport Hotels
4/19/2012 1:29:03 AM
dtegFc Great article.Much thanks again. Fantastic.
Reply
totLXYVunL
Social Bookmarks
12/21/2012 9:18:42 PM
7pahtC Thanks a lot for the blog article.Really thank you! Cool.
Reply
erFAmLKmxBqp
loss weight pills
2/1/2013 11:11:34 PM
DcTKod Really informative blog article.Really thank you! Cool.
Reply
fanFmHtRCkqdPn
generic clomid
2/28/2013 5:33:43 AM
NQoqj9 Thanks for sharing, this is a fantastic post.Thanks Again. Fantastic.
Reply

Post your comment

Disclaimer: Do not use this forum as a channel to promote hatred, tribalism or any other kind of personal grievances. The administration can delete or edit a post that violates these guidelines. Keep the posts relevant to the topic in an attempt to keep the forum organised and maintain the focus on each topic. Thank you for your understanding. READ MORE

Other sites of MG Media Group are Nigeria Films, The Nigerian Voice, Modern Ghana