"If You Have Time To Talk About Others, Then You Should Have Time To Try And Discover Yourself"--Stella Damascus
Sometimes I sit down and try to take stock of my life and its numerous stages.
It amazes me to see how far I have come even in the midst of the storm. God is indeed faithful to those who love and serve him.
Growing up was a bit funny for me outside the walls of my home. I grew up in a wonderfully balanced family with a lot of love and care from both my parents who were bankers, my older sisters who taught me so much and even my late kid brother even though his time was short.
For some reason I thought there was something wrong with me and I will tell you why.
I realized that, in school my name always came up whether or not I was a part of the issue. People just loved to talk about me, most of the time it was more negative than positive. Even if I was not guilty of whatever they accused me of, they would still go on and on.
This was such a huge problem to me as a young girl, to the point that I was not able to enjoy boarding school. I thought the world hated me and i did not fit in, and that was when I heard that people called me an "OSU", which means OUTCAST, just because of my surname.
That actually made me laugh at the end of the day seeing that most people did not even know the origin or history of my name.
After so many years of being paranoid about what people were saying about me, I finally opened up to my parents. My mother laughed so hard that I wondered if she heard a word of what I said.
That was when my father (God rest his soul) looked at me and said "have you taken a good look at yourself in the mirror? Have you not noticed how beautiful you are, or are you saying you do not know you are intelligent"?
At that point I just felt it was a normal encouragement line that a parent would give his child to make them feel better, but I soon realized it was far from it.
Then he said "can't you see that you are different because you are special? Do you need anyone to tell you how blessed you are?
My mother called me and said "there are three types of people in this world
A: those who were born to be talked about because of who they are
B: those who were born to talk about others because that is all they are
C: those who were born to observe because they don't know who they are
Which one would you rather be my dear?"
I smiled because I knew that I was a TYPE A.This is how I see it;
God the creator sets a mini clock on every human being, he opens his big shopping mall which is the earth. Then he gives us all a shopping list to go into the shopping mall and buy everything on our list.
He also sets the clock to a time which he knows should be enough for us to finish our shopping. Bear in mind that everybody has a different list, and from the moment he hands you the money (talent, skills, health, wisdom, brain, etc) and your list, your own clock starts to count.
So imagine that we have all come to this shopping mall, you see Stella walking in and out of shops buying the things on her list. Then you stop and start to laugh at her ugly shoes, you call your friends and start to talk about the old fashioned chair she bought. Stella walks past you again and you start to laugh at her cheap weavon and the fact that there is too much blue in her eye shadow.
In all of this you are so caught up in your psycho analysis and gossip about Stella, that you forget that your clock is still ticking away. Meanwhile the person you are talking about is trying her possible best to buy everything on her shopping list, and make it back home early before she runs out of time.
This is what will happen; Stella will finish buying the items in her list, and go home right on time. On the flip side, you who have wasted more than half your own time following someone around, so eventually, you will not be able to finish buying the things on your list before the shop closes and your time is up.
A lot of people have filled up the graves with DEAD DREAMS and VISIONS. They spend the life span and energy God has given them for their own purpose on others and waste time minding other people's business.
It is so sad and painful but most importantly it does not make sense to me especially for adults.
Some people say it is as a result of joblessness but I disagree. I insist that if you have time to talk about others, then you should have time to try and discover yourself, spend time knowing who you are.
What is your purpose on earth?
What are you supposed to be doing at this point in your life?
Are you Satisfied with where you are right now?
Are you doing what you have always wanted to do?
Are you adding value to people around you?
Are you ready to take your situation to the next level?
What do you want to be remembered for?
What are your ambitions?
Have you accomplished up to half the things you set for yourself?
Trust me if you spend your time trying to answer all these questions and work on them, you will find that you won't have time for idle talk, you will also realize that you don't have enough hours in a day to do the things you really want to do especially the things that you love.
I know who I am and I have no apologies for it. So I hope you will make it out of the shopping mall at the right time with your items complete.
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