One outstanding and probably the most lucrative aspect of writing where best sellers have made a fortune, is in the area of relationship. This is not too far from the fact that everyone desires a good relationship in life, be it home, work or play. Men and women of different ages practically yearn for how to improve on their relationships.
Marriage seminars and counselling for couples and the engaged attract massive patronage. On the other hand, majority of the problems we have today seem to be either as direct aftermath of bad/broken relationships or people just generally carry the spill over effect of their relationships around.
Consciously or otherwise, a person in a happier relationship is more relaxed and tends to offer more love to others.
This article therefore comes as one of those aids to help your relationship experience a better feel. There are certain things lovers can do to improve on their relationship with each other. Were you surprised when I said they are just 26? Yes, let’s use the letters of the alphabet so you’ll know it is as simple as ABC.
•A-Appreciation: This does not only make the other party feel good, but there is a deep sense of fulfilment, self worth and relevance that go with it. The more you appreciate your spouse, the more he/she will long to please you.
•B-Build: Your contribution towards the growth of your partner remains a pride in the relationship. Can you confidently look back and count the few or many ways you have contributed to your lover’s success? In what way/ways have you added to the value you met in him/her?
•C-Complement: When two people come together in love, their purpose should not be competition. If you want to compete, check out your mates at work and see who can beat who in performance. But when you come to your relationship, simply be there for each other by filling the gaps. Your spouse does not need to be a perfect person, but if you are open-hearted, a lot can be achieved. Do what you are good at and allow the other person to function where he/she has strength.
•D-Dignity: I was engrossed in a conversation with my friend during a birthday party, when a rude masculine voice interrupted us. As I turned, I could not believe my eyes, it was a man I knew and respected so much that was actually barking at his wife. The woman just walked away in shame. We owe our spouses that little respect, especially when we are outside or with a third party. It does feel good to be treated with respect.
•E-Expression: We often make the mistake of thinking our partners are mind readers. If your lover should always know what is on your mind, be careful, you are with a ‘spiritualist.’ The bottom line is that we learn to say the things that bother us just as they are, so we could be understood and helped.
•F-Faithfulness: Once people hear the word faithfulness, their minds go to the emotional commitment of the relationship, but let me shock you a bit that it is not what I am talking about here. Faithfulness is a virtue needed in every union; it involves your ability to identify and run with the vision of the union, striving to achieve your common goal and above all, standing with your spouse against all odds.
•G-Giving: When I hear people complain that one of the problems they have in their relationship is the other person’s unwillingness to part with gifts, I wonder what they are still doing there in the first place. One natural sign of love is G-I-V-I-N-G. If someone cannot part with material things, how can he/she truly give love which involves the whole being?
•H-Hugging: This is one secret of love most people have missed out. Hugging your spouse can be such a refreshing experience after a hard day’s job. Psychologists have agreed that even children feel loved when hugged and cuddled often. So, make it a daily thing.
•I-Ignore: Learn to ignore little faults on the side of your partner. This does not mean you should not say what you don’t like, but let it be done with respect. No need to nag.
•J-Joke: Jokes are healthy exercises for the mind and facial muscles. There could be no better person to joke with than the one you love as it really brings you closer. Some jokes could be customised for just both of you. It makes you giggle and beam, doesn’t it?
•K-Kinsmen: You cannot enjoy a relationship without loving the members of your spouse’s family. Let the love you have for him/her show in the way you relate to his siblings. If you truly love, you will accommodate others.
•L-Learning: A man cannot stop learning until he dies. Learn more about love and life generally and discover new ways to please your partner in everything you do. Also learn to improve your knowledge and add value to your everyday life.
•M-Maturity: Are you still the mummy’s boy/girl that walked down the aisle on your wedding day? Too bad. For you to have a stable and blissful relationship, you must attain maturity. How do you know if you are mature? When the things that used to upset you so madly no longer matter and you think of the consequences of your action/reaction before you act. Also seek to please others first, etc.
•N-Nurturing: What nurturing does to a relationship is like fuel in a car. You simply look for those subtle salient aspects of your spouse and pour praises on them, hoping to make them more pronounced and evident. Why should outsiders discover the good part in your lover for you? Look for it and fan it to great flames.
•O-Obey: I know men love to hear this, but funny enough, both men and women need to obey each other for love to thrive. You need to listen to the contributions of your partner if a great union is your priority. This does not show wea