Like a song gone sour, a fractured relationship leaves behind a broken heart that may never mend. In some cases, you simply find that the relationship was never meant to have the kind of ‘longevity’ that leads to marriage, with the result that both parties involved simply went their separate ways.
When these separations occur, do the doors shut permanently to the extent they never say hello to each other? For many, turning down an ex is unthinkable, while some other people feel it’s good riddance.
The question is: would you help your ex, either financially, or put in a word to facilitate approvals for him/her if you were in a position to do so? Would you even go the extra mile of donating an organ to save his/her life? Sunday Sun put these posers to a number of people, and got these interesting responses…
Mrs. Sola Cole – Early childhood educator
I can help the person, especially if there are kids involved. Even if we parted on a bitter note, I will still help. If I am in a position to do so, I will forgive and help. Especially if I have someone else who has given me joy, I will overlook whatever wrong he did.
Could I donate an organ, no, but I can donate my blood.
Mrs. Franca Ibrahim – Early childhood educator
Really, I don’t have an ex, my husband was my first friend. But if the situation arises, and such help would not put me in trouble, I will help him, and my husband has to be in the picture. But as per donating an organ, no, I can’t.
Mrs. Victoria Adeniyi – Head teacher at a private school
I’ll find it difficult to help the man if he jilted me. You know it’s a difficult thing when a man jilts a woman. For some, it becomes a psychological problem. I’ve not experienced it before but I’ve seen a lady, she is a medical doctor, who got jilted sometime in 2004, and she ended up at the psychiatric hospital... she is still there.
Of course, as Christians, we are enjoined to forgive, but it will be difficult.
However, if it has to do with saving his life by donating an organ, I can do that. I can donate a kidney or blood if the person’s life depended on it.
Folake Jeremiah – Skills trainer and consultant
Whether to help or not would depend on the level of involvement with him. For instance, are there children involved, were we married or divorced, is there still any bond between us? In that case, I may be able to assist; otherwise, I’ll get a non-profit making organisation to help. One really has to be careful.
Mr. Oladele Osawe – A veteran actor
It depends on the platform for separation. If the love is there, nothing is too much. But if she is with another man, why should you donate your organ for another to use? That would be foolhardy and stupid!
Mr. Apama Huntas – A civil servant
If the separation was with animosity, why should I help? When a woman is no longer in love, she can do terrible things. I’ve had that experience, we separated in court, and the court warned us both to steer clear of each other, flouting that, we would risk seven years imprisonment. If I must, there has to be a middleman, can’t just go and meet her like that. Solomon said, doing good is good, but be careful. She has to apologise; then ask for assistance.
Tolulope Aderemi – Legal practitioner
I think whatever may have brought a man and woman together so much as to be regarded as spouses is enough reason to compel either of the spouses to show compassion to the other in times of need. If my ex-spouse requires my assistance (financial or otherwise), if I am in a position to assist her, I will gladly do so. Why won’t I if I can assist the needy on the street? What if she was so bad to me before leaving, the flesh might not want me to, but I will simply regard her as one of the ‘needy’ and would simply do my bit for the sake of the Almighty God.
As regards donating a part of my body (for instance, kidney), no, I will not do so. It’s a matter of principle. However, if it’s a life-threatening situation, my answer might be different.
Seun Ayebiiwo – Chemical engineer
Sure, I can help out either way, financially or through organ donation, so far it does not affect me negatively in any way. Besides, I would have consulted my wife before doing so. But the first thing to do is to pray about it before taking any action.