Dear Aunty aurora,

I have been married for five years to a good man but it seems that isn’t enough anymore. We have been happy together and we have a three-year-old son also. My husband tries his best to satisfy me and I was content until a new couple moved into the next flat.

My husband is not usually at home and it does get lonely being alone in the house with our son. There are days I get frustrated with the fact that he is not usually around to keep me company or even there to share my thoughts with and we would sometimes have arguments about this. We were still able to cope with ours situation until six months back when he travelled and stayed away for two months. I got restless staying indoors all by myself after I had put our son to bed and decided to step outside our apartment for a while. That was when Mr Richard and I met.

He and his wife moved into the flat next to ours and considering all that I was dealing with, I wasn’t able to visit and welcome them properly, so we said our hellos and exchanged pleasantries. He said good night and went into his flat but not long after that he came outside again. He asked if all was well and how my husband was. I told him my husband was out of town and that he won’t be back till later but while I was still talking, I unthinkingly burst into tears and startled my neighbour.

He tried calming me down and only asked what the problem was when I stopped crying. It felt so good to finally talk to someone about my husband’s constant travelling that I poured out my heart to a man I hardly knew. After I had finished talking, he then revealed that he was going through the same thing with his wife who was a serial globe-trotter. And that was how our odd friendship started.

To cut the long story short, my neighbour in whom I have found a friend and confidante is now more attractive to me than my own husband and sometimes I get the feeling that he finds me attractive as well. My husband is home now but I don’t even feel like talking to him most times and would rather spend the time chatting with Richard on the phone. I know my actions might cause serious problems later but I can’t help myself anymore. Please what should I do?

From

Chidinma, Port-Harcourt

 

Aunty Aurora 

Thank you for reaching out for help when you can still make use of it. Your dilemma isn’t one that is uncommon and not many even know they have a problem much less seek help for it. Continuing your friendship Mr Richard only spells doom for your marriage and when all is said and done, you would wonder why you allowed yourself to make such a mistake in the first place.

You need to also sincerely open up to your husband about what has been going on and let him know how you feel and that you are willing to turn a new leaf. Being a mother should also remind you of the fact that you have your son to worry about in this whole situation. I believe you still love your family and you are just tempted by the temporary attention you are getting from your ‘friend’. In simple terms I advise you to run for your life and save your home. I wish you all the best.

Aunty Aurora.